Love Labor's Lost

volumes of mis-adventures

Existing In-between

I’m the only girl of 3 siblings. I’m not the oldest. I’m not the youngest. I was born in Ukraine, but raised in Chicago. I am good at math, but have a passion for writing. I like to teach, but I miss being a student.

I believe in living in-between.

Most people revel in straightforward definitions. They like that things are black or white; people fear the grey area. I find comfort in a state of neither here nor there, in compromise, in a collage of moments that make up the bigger picture.

Growing up it always felt like we were moving. We weren’t, but I never really felt like I was at home: constantly waiting for the next place. As it turns out in my life, up to now, I have never lived in one place for longer than 6 years consecutively. Routine bores me. Comfort scares me. Change is a beautiful thing.

In sixth grade I took my first photography class. We were to make a pinhole camera out of an old canister and a cap with a small pin sized hole cut into the top, with a cardboard slate to keep the light out until you were ready to capture an image. Simply, I taped a piece of photosensitive paper to the inside of the canister in the dark room, and then headed outside to find the “perfect” moment. My favorite part of that pinhole camera was the mystery of what the sun, the hole, and the paper would actually create. In the darkroom with the paper developing, there is a moment right before the image is completely developed, when the black, white, and grey don’t quite create anything discernable. That moment, in-between, allows for imagination, opportunity, creation and possibilities. The things that happen right after a moment, and right before the next, are twinkles of reflection, seconds when identity is created, when definitions can be written, when we find out what we want and who we are.

I’ve always felt that life is a spectrum, and we constantly move back and forth. From day to day the marked sides of that spectrum decidedly change. As we move along that continuum every new tick, every new day, is made up of everything that has happened before, and the potential for anything to happen tomorrow.

I believe that we need to embrace the in-between because that’s where opportunities and potential collide to create a beautiful reality.

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